Thursday, January 20, 2011

Stomach Is To Upset and I'm To Stressed To Sleep

I can't get comfortable enough to sleep because my stomach is bugging me more than usual. I'm not sure if the tacos I ate just didn't agree with my stomach or if this is the whole possible health/possible pregnancy issue.

It also doesn't help that I have way to much on my mind. I'm stressing over a lot of things and that is horrible on a baby. And as I stressed about possibly being pregnant I looked over to my nightstand and realized I was drinking sweet tea, which isn't good for a baby either so then I started to worry about that. So I basically have a never ending list of worries and stress because my eating style isn't good for a baby and with how I've been painting.... UGH!

I honestly am finding myself more than willing and even happy to set up an appointment and go to the doctors that way I'll at least know if I'm pregnant or not.

I been asked, "Do you want to be pregnant?", "Do you want a baby?" or whatever other wording has been used. I basically end up answering, "It is what it is. I'll be excited if I am pregnant and I'll be a little upset if I'm not."

When my whole "problem" started I hated the idea that I could possibly be pregnant, but then I totally changed and I was excited so I decided to take a test and that test was negative so I thought maybe it's just to early so I took another one a week or two later and it was also negative, which was very depressing. I figure the test would know what it was talking about so I just went on with my life not thinking about it, but when I realized that another month had gone by and that I hadn't had my period I started to get worried and now here I am at 11:41pm I can't go to sleep and I have work in the morning (not my bread job, but my office job)

I am so exhausted right now, I keep waking up kinda slow, getting a good amount of energy after a few hours, and then nearly falling over at night. I don't know where the energy from the morning is coming from and I don't know why I get so tired so quickly.

But another thing that is really bugging me is how on earth to lay so that I can sleep! I try to lay on my back and that isn't comfortable partly because I can't find a place to lay my arms because if I put them on my stomach it makes my stomach more upset and I can't put them to my sides because that's not comfortable. If I lay on my sides my stomach nearly "screams" in frustration.

I need a therapist, a masseuse, a doctor, an interior decorator, a maid, and a butler! And I need them now! I also need someone else to pay for it all! A therapist to help with my stress, a masseuse to help with my back and neck pains, a doctor (which should be first on my list) to help me figure out what on earth is going on inside me, an interior designer to help fix up my house (I HATE white walls!), and I'm pretty sure the maid and butler are self explanatory.

Happy Sleeping!!!! (Hopefully for both you and myself!)

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